This is a post that tugs at my heart strings. Mostly because I have been through divorce and intimately understand the pain that both leads up to the decision and the pain of moving through with it. This personal experience is one that led me to wanting a deeper understanding of how two people can keep integrity and respect in tack while working making all the decisions that must be made when ending a relationship.
It is this that has led me to be a mediator and a Nonviolent Communication specialist, offering my skills to help couples – married or not – come to a deeper connection through effective communication skills and from this platform, making decisions that hold the value of both people.
I am excited to be adding to my “toolbox” of skills that of being a Collaborative Coach. Here is a definition of the Collaborative Divorce Model:
“The Collaborative Model uses an interest based negotiation approach, rather than an adversarial approach, to resolve conflict. Collaborative practice is based on the premise that the family as a whole is in transition. That whole must now be divided into separate homes and each of the homes must strive to be whole individually. Thus, a collaborative divorce encourages each party to consider his or her own needs as they relate to the family, undergoing one of its most difficult life transitions.
“When a party focuses on his or her needs, that party can reconnect to the reasons he or she formulated a certain position and let go of the attachment to that particular outcome. Each party is then free to take a step back and reexamine the issues. This allows the parties to explore the issues more freely and find out whether there is any point of common ground. When not attached to particular outcomes, each party is able to hear and consider what needs are important to the other, to incorporate his or her own needs into the discussion, and to explore a variety of different options.” CO. Collaborative Divorce Professionals
And, so in the end, this post is actually one that excites me because I so firmly believe in the work I do and am eager to bring this new training to my services. KB